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Home > Marriage > Communication > Training for the Long Haul


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Training for the Long Haul
Marriage is a lot like running a marathon—but the rewards are even better.
by Billy Milton | posted 9/12/2008 11:35AM



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Any athlete will tell you that the glamour event of Olympics track and field is the 100-meter sprint. Just watch these runners at the starting line—they strut like peacocks, showing off their muscles; pulling faces; mugging for the cameras; getting ready to explode from the blocks for 10 seconds or so of amazing effort. Nearly everyone can name a great sprinter or two—Jesse Owens, Carl Lewis, Linford Christie.

Now, how many truly great marathon runners can you name? Not so many, I'll bet.

Although the 100-meter sprinters get the glory, they're useless at any distance over 400 meters and almost certainly couldn't run a marathon, despite being extremely fit. Professional athletes will all tell you that the people they really admire aren't the sprinters—they're the marathon runners.

One of the main reasons sprinters won't run a marathon is that they just can't wrap their minds around running 26 miles in one go. The thought terrifies and defeats them before they even attempt it.

When I began running, I started doing just a few miles. Running a marathon seemed inconceivable. But I thought I might be able to work up to a 10k race. The day I finished my first 10k I thought, I can't believe I did it! How on earth does anyone turn right around and run more than four times more? I had a 10k mentality, so that's all my mind would accept.

Later on I raised my target to a half-marathon, and all too soon the big day arrived. I ran the race and as I crossed the line, guess what I was thinking? Thank goodness I reached the finish line. How on earth does anyone turn right around and run this all over again? Impossible! This time I had a half-marathon mentality.

When I eventually ran my first marathon, I stood at the starting line thinking, 26.2 miles. Not 10k. Not 13.1 miles. Not even 20 miles. I'd made up my mind that I was going to run 26.2 miles and not a single yard less! It was difficult; my whole body wanted to stop—many times. But I'd made up my mind, so there was no option but to keep going until I succeeded.

Developing a marathon mentality

Why do so many marriages fail? Quite simply, couples start their married life with a sprinter's mentality and when the reality of the commitment hits them, they bail. They aren't thinking marathon—they're thinking sprint. They're thinking, Glamour and glory, when they need to think, Guts and graft.

The marathon runner doesn't stop running when he gets a stitch in his side—even though he may really want to. He doesn't give up because of a few blisters. Most don't even give up when they pull a muscle; they run on through the pain. And when the runner is on the final stretch, the sense of accomplishment is almost overwhelming. Much more so than a simple sprint. Yet many people give up before experiencing the glory.




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