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Key Bible Verse: … Forever changing our minds about what we believe because someone has told us something different (Ephesians 4:14). Bonus Reading: James 1:5-8

When Allison was quite young, I told her to pick up her toys. She did it perfectly, without complaining and without being told twice. I wanted to reward her, so I reached for the cupboard to get out some chocolate chips, when a little voice in the back of my mind warned, "Didn't you read an article that said not to use food as a reward?"

Immediately I took off on a furious mental deliberation. I wanted to reward my daughter, but I didn't want to plant the seeds of a future eating disorder. Should I just ignore the fact that she did something I wanted to reinforce, and hope that the lack of a negative response would keep her acting this way in the future? Or should I reward her, which some experts say can produce all kinds of negative effects? But maybe I could reward her with something besides food; maybe I could take her out for a walk, or we could go to Baskin-Robbins—but no, that would be food, too.

My wacky internal debate ended abruptly when a little three-year old looked up at me and asked, "Daddy, are you gonna share your chocolate chips or are you just gonna stand there and eat 'em all by yourself?"

—Gary Thomas in Sacred Parenting

My Response: How do I deal with feeling inadequate as a parent?

Thought to Apply: Experience … has ways of boiling over, and making us correct our present formulas.—WILLIAM JAMES (psychologist & philosopher)

Adapted from Sacred Parenting (Zondervan, 2004) by permission.

Copyright © 2006 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine.Click here for reprint information on Men of Integrity.

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Prayer for the Week

Thank you, Father, for using my children to reveal where it is I need to grow up, and to push me to put their needs ahead of my own.

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