Hey Dad,

Score one for the big guy! In terms of Olympic husbanding, I won the gold! Well … at least this time. It was simple, really. I did a little pre-planning, asked my parents to watch the kids, and then whisked my wife away on the great birthday adventure.

Actually, it wasn't that exciting—just a couple of outlet malls, a downtown hotel, and time alone without children. And here's the best part: We talked about "stuff" … with no interruptions and no distractions. We discussed the coming school year, family goals, and how we can be better parents. I told her how beautiful she was and how lucky I was to have her as my wife.

End result—aahhhhhhhh!!

The great thing about it was that my wife thought I was wonderful. She felt loved, cherished, and special. She even told me that I was the best husband in the world (she doesn't always feel that way—know what I mean?). Had I picked up a birthday card at Wal-Mart and gotten her a blouse, I don't think I would have gotten the same response.

Now don't get me wrong, she would have been thankful … but she wouldn't have felt cherished. So what's the difference between the two?

Effort.

The one takes hardly any, but the other involved calling my parents in advance, packing the kids without her knowledge, making a hotel reservation, spending a chunk of my precious money, and cheerfully walking around an outlet mall when I'd rather do anything but walk around an outlet mall.

Like she said, "I can't believe you did all this just for me."

Dad, that's love! It's going the extra mile; it's sacrificial; it's the way it was meant to be. So, maybe it's time you did a little scheming. Pawn off the kids on someone, book a hotel, and whisk your wife away for a surprise overnight.

Be extravagant. Do what she wants, and then talk about "stuff." She'll feel loved, refreshed, and ready to tackle life again. I would just bet she'll look at you with fresh new eyes, smile, and say, "I can't believe you did all this just for me."

You 'da Olympic gold medalist dad!

© 2004 Todd Wilson. Reprinted from 8/12/04. Used by permission.

[08/08/2008]

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